“Get 3 months of free music with your AirPods Pro”

Today I was getting ready for a Zoom meeting, but my AirPods (Pro, gen 3) weren’t connecting to my work laptop (Tahoe 26.3). I assumed it was one of the usual AirPods failure modes where my phone or personal laptop might be holding onto the connection from the day before.

I checked my iPhone — no connection.

Next troubleshooting step: Put them back in the case. Count to five. Open the case. Hope they connect.

Worse. I get the dreaded half-screen setup sheet that says something like “These aren’t your AirPods” asking if I want to connect them. This happens a few times a year. They’ll go missing from my Apple account, I’ll re-pair, and then they mostly work for the next six months.

Fine, start the setup process.

Yes, I want to enable Announce Calls.

No, I don’t want to enable Announce Notifications.

Yes, I want to use Personalized Volume.

Yes, I want to enable head gestures to answer and decline phone calls.

No, I don’t want to turn on Conversational Awareness.

No, I don’t want to take a hearing test.

No, I don’t want to try a demo of live translation.

And then…

Get 3 months of free music with your AirPods Pro

An advertisement. In the setup wizard. After a product failure. While I’m stressed and late for a work meeting.

And Apple couldn’t even be bothered to make the advertisement properly fit on screen. On their latest flagship iPhone.

My wife switched to a pair of Sony earbuds last year after swearing off AirPods for frequently failing to charge. She’s enjoyed them. So instead of accepting Apple’s generous three free months of Apple Music, I put that money to better use and bought a pair of Sony WF-1000XM5 (what a name) on my lunch break.

I no longer care if AirPods are the better product for my needs. They’re not the experience I want. And, increasingly, more and more of what Apple offers is not, either.